Thanks To My Only Brother

In the midst of fall semester nearing its end, I’ve decided to come out of my writing hiatus.

Don’t get me wrong - nearly all of my time over the past several months has been dedicated to writing, but less for pleasure and more for forced class assignments. I never knew that 12 credits could be so stressful, but I’ve learned that it is in fact possible to feel burned out from taking a capstone public relations course, senior-level English class and feature writing at the same time. I began to think that writing even for my own solace would feel like nothing but another chore.

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One November morning, I had two realizations as I lazily sat around my apartment:

1. It was less than a week until my older brother, Collin’s, 25th birthday and I had zero gift ideas for him.

2. With no job and an increasingly aggressive spending habit, I was starting to fit the mold for a broke college student with a limited budget.

For a fleeting moment, I considered gifting him the few Miller Lite cans he left in my fridge from a previous weekend that he visited me in State College and topping the surprise off with 12 Smirnoff Ices he bought, and subsequently forgot, to bring to our family’s football tailgate. I was tempted to give him this present really in a joking manner because it was paid for entirely with his own money.

Yet as I looked across my living room, I caught a glimpse of the expensive bottle of gin that he had gotten me for my 21st birthday and all of a sudden, my previous idea didn’t sit right. Money may not mean everything, but I knew that I could do something just a little bit more meaningful to celebrate.

Instead, I did the only other thing that I could think of; I opened my computer and started to think about all of the admiring words I could share. An important note to make about my brother, however, is that he’s pretty well-known among his friends and family for having one of the darkest, and even the best, senses of humor. So, writing some deep and emotional tribute to him (like I did on for my step-sister, Paige’s, 18th birthday) wasn’t exactly sitting right, either. The comprise, I decided, was to write some sort of "Thank You" letter - one that didn't have to be taken so seriously, but still paid homage to some of the lessons you've taught me.

Thank you for getting in trouble so that I didn’t have to. And by this, I mean that Mom and Dad were much more inclined to be strict with you: the first-born child. In fact, this tendency has actually been scientifically proven. There might only be a modest three-and-a-half-year age gap between us, but this made all the difference in my ability to get away with doing some of the very things that you got in trouble for. Just one example of this is when Dad was appalled by your request to download Snoop Dogg songs on your iPod Nano, and was quick to shut down the idea. When I was a similar age however, I seemed to have total freedom and virtually unlimited access to an iTunes account for my iPod Touch. I managed to buy the entire Eminem Curtain Call: Greatest Hits album without much judgement at all.

Thank you for being the athletic sibling. Though I loved playing volleyball, there was a special connection between you and baseball. Some of my fondest memories include ones where there was a Dairy Queen near whatever school you were playing at and ones where I'd pass time on the playground with your teammate's younger sisters. You and Dad would talk the entire drive home from a game, and I'd sit in the backseat and pretend to know whether or not a catcher's "pop time" was fast or slow.

Because of you, we got to make small vacations out of a few of the tournaments you played in Harrisburg and I was guaranteed endless hot dog-and-candy dinners from concession stands over the years. Being dragged to all of your games was initially a chore, but in time grew to be something that I enjoyed taking part in as a spectator.

Thank you for showing me the ropes once I got to Penn State. This serves as the time where I learned that I could really count on you as a friend, as an additional part of our innate bond as siblings. I was incredibly homesick throughout my freshman year and you went out of your way to help. Even the smallest gestures like grabbing lunch with me or sending an invite for the parties at your apartment meant the world to me. (You really outdid yourself when you sacrificed part of a gameday morning to drive me to MedExpress when I thought I had pink eye, btw.) You taught me that tailgating at 9 a.m., even for a night game, is a must and that living in The Graduate was a personality trait.

Thank you for introducing me to a group of people that now feels like family. Admittedly, I’ve always been envious that you’ve kept in touch with your tight-knit group from high school. For the past several years I’ve watched you and the same few friends play sports together, move to college and take on the bars together, and now have real adult lives with grown-up jobs - but yet, you still are always together. At this point, I’ve outgrown out of my annoying younger sister shell (for the most part, at least) and have gotten to grow closer with your circle, too. Whether the spontaneous nights in Mom’s garage or hours upon hours of tailgating are to blame, it feels like our groups of friends have merged and have become the best possible addition to our family.

And lastly, thank you for sticking by my side. Going back and forth between Mom’s and Dad’s house from an early age was not always easy, and it was tremendously helpful to share many of the same experiences with you. You’re one of the few people on the planet that can understand the true joy that the China Wok Buffet brought our family, remember the countless games of Guitar Hero that we used to play with Dad, and recognize the song “Love Shack” as your personal anthem. I’ve seen you make just about anyone laugh and I know that I can count on you to point out every stupid comment I make or question I ask. The times we get to hangout may be few and far between now, but this has only made me look even more forward to the moments we spend together as a family. It’s a funny, yet even more special, thing to feel closer than ever while living several hours apart.

Thanks for being the best big brother and role model that I could ask for. I hope that your 25th year of life brings you continued adventures in Manayunk, more Penn State football wins and lots of great whiskey! I'll see you soon, and don't worry, I actually did get you a real gift, too.